Goblin Uprising

Running - Twenty - Flying, hopping, climbing, fleeing!
Dashing, sneaking, bounding, leaping, scurrying.....

And the day was off to such a lovely start, too.

Making magical items, of course we were down both Pyre and the giant undead bear…..and then the humans turned it to utter shite. Of course they came in invisible and all buffed up, and of course they summoned a massive rhinoceros on our heads.

The troglodyte showed a startling amount of good sense, and fled.

Once we stopped trying to kill them, and instead bubbled them out of the combat, things improved considerably. Unfortunately, by then we were all nearly dead. Well over half the party hit negative hit points….sigh I wonder what my new body will be?

What we know:
- Druid, summoned Rhinoceros, at least 7th level.
- Wizard (?), throwing five-missile magic missile barrages.
- Woman with dreadlocks – two attacks per round and channel negative, which suggests 8th level Cleric, but also cast arcane spells. Confusing.
- Andrea – ? – Invisible, didn’t reliably hit Sandy.
- Elf ranger-dude – blonde, shoots at least as hard as Hugmug, no obvious animal in sight. DR?
- Fighter – Couldn’t hit him on a 29, at least two attacks per round.

Eighteen-Nineteen : Wherein we run out of obvious things to do.
A giant, a couple mooks, and the loss of the Dire Bear!

Work the forge, write the runes. Work the forge, write the runes. At least I’m getting some practice crafting for real now, and we’re all back together. That, and the treasure. Shiiiiny, shiiiny treasure.

Ah well; at least the attackers have been reasonably easy to repel, but we seriously need to fix up that tower. And kill all the humans. And possibly some of the goblin tribe.

So, hammer and forge, all day long.

Quick recap this time:

  • Making the items. Finished about 3/4ths, including MadKix’s bow.
  • Need to go check in on Prayer Beads.
  • Witch Ogre and ogre brethren attacked, and overran the ruined tower. Need to fix that.
  • Collected taxes successfully! Fiend Form I is the best. :)
  • Dire bear bought it. Sad. Need to fix that, too.
  • Pyre can successfully pose as a very grumpy dwarf, and deal with the town.
  • We should bank with the dwarf – 2k gold or so, just as an emergency reserve.
  • Wolf pack! Roo has a gang, now.
  • Trogolydyte manservant.
Seventeen - In which deals are made and some goblins get a new home.
The Office of Goblin Revenue

One might expensive extra-planar phone call (Borgletuly the imp is a scam artist, I tell ya), and we were face to, er, flames, with Alhazab himself – who the witch seems to know. A little too well, if you know what I mean.

He seems rather pointedly uninterested in this whole plane – but he was willing to make his lads go ‘poof’ in return for the gem, so hey, even if we didn’t cut a Devil’s deal, we got out ahead! No more Kraksis.

Agatha and her mother mauled the ogres who’d tried to take over the office of material revenue – and we scored! One loose paving stone later, and we have our own golem-defended-bank. Never mind that Furion appeared worried about a Dragon-worshipping kobold cult, or that there’s illithids on the island, more elves, a fire giant forge out there somewhere (new trading partners?), archer gnolls in the wild, kobolds all over the isle we should kill off, or that the adventurers are still looking for us…

…nope, no reason to worry about any of that. We’ve got a lovely new tower and castle set!

Furion knew a thing or two about fortresses, let me tell you. I just need to move my forge up here, and we can crank out some real toys with the massive pile of gold we’re sitting on.

….now why would a wizard have a fortress for no obvious reason, with no spire or lab, out in the wilds?

Sixteen (Never mind that last one)
GIANT RUBY - That is all.

In the face of almost certain maimery by the humans, the noble goblins turned tail and fled, leaving a note pointing the ‘Rapid Response Squad’ (more on that later) toward the wizard-cat, and the sheep alone in the field. (And I was so looking forward to a nice mutton lettuce and tomato, where the mutton is sliced ever so thin…mmm…ahem)

Fleeing a bit, we passed a giant Grey guy playing music in the woods to a bunch of Gnolls – left them unmolested in the hopes they might slow the humans a bit. Pyre went to spy on the humans, and found a couple tidbits:

  • They have an insultingly low bounty on us, and the adventurers are still out there trying to claim it.
  • ….said bounty has no description or identifying marks, other than that some of us are of us are spellcasters and we’re mid-level. We could absolutely find some patsy goblins, dress them up a bit, and split the bounty with the dwarf…
  • Hansel – Bishop of his sunshininess – church figure of some import, and means the local cleric garrison is non-trivial.
  • This is a royal colony (King Edwin) they’re looking to grow – they’ve recently cleared the area of all dangerous humanoids.
  • Rapid Response Squad – A elite squad of military and local adventurers, at least 10, Many in chain and cloth – seems to be a solid mix of classes of pain.
  • This town is a military colony – 1000+ civilians, but 100s of military. Must be heavily supply-line dependent.

The witches’ mother gives me the willies – Night Hags steal souls, and they don’t even pay you for them!

But.None.Of.That.Is.Important, because Ruuuuuuby! The witch tricked the Formorian into thinking he hadn’t buried the ruby deep enough – after he checked on it, we dug it up and high-tailed it back to the witch’s, giant glowing soul gem in tow.

Bullet points:

  • Dodged the humans. Nyah-nyah! Pointed them to the Rakshasa (Wizard-Cat – Far more badass than we should ever mess with).
  • Ran into grey guy +gnolls in the woods. Avoided.
  • Pyre spied on the humans, but may have tipped them off that someone was there.
  • We came up with a nifty trick to use light pebbles as a means of 1-bit emergency signalling. Theoretically could use this to bypass restrictions on sending information at trans-light speed.
  • Witch is going to warn Wizard-cat about impending humans.
  • We should ransom some other goblins as the ‘deadly tiny elves’ – via the dwarf?
  • Witch helped us trick the Formorian into going to the ruby.
  • We now have the ruby, and are on our way to the witch’s, with the witch (who’s mother is actually a Night Hag).

Five foot feet, left normal, right club. Wandered around down in the sinkhole a lot. No obvious exit.

Scrabbled up the out.

Giant? Blue guy?

Witch thinks that this might have been Furion’s.

Toersg studies ring.

Two parts old part and recent elaborations.
Old part was prevent possession and domination.
New part (years to couple months) prevent detection

Hole is weeks/months old.

Four-fifteen - Unda Da Sea!
Aquatic acrobatics and you!

(Quick summary of last time.)
- Killed undead things
- Stole from wyverns, got some good alchemy and scrolls.
- Bus got to second base. An undead beastie macked on him.

I swear, those people can’t decide whether to kill it, eat it, or make friends with it. Why go to all the trouble to feed the wyverns only to kill them?

Come here, hold this. If we’re fleeing, we’re doing it properly.

Look, the wyverns, all right, fine. But Baughb is a negative channeling cleric. What business did that idiot have getting into a slap-fight with wraiths? Lucky the whole party didn’t die; and they didn’t even get any loot!

The chimera in the woods was just adding insult to injury. At least Hugmug put a few good arrows into it.

Quick bullets:

  • Killed 4/6th of the wyverns and looted not much from them.
  • We tied a rope to a wyvern and the cave baddie (9+HD) pulled it over the edge.
  • Dark shapes in shark cave – Shadows?
  • Serious CON damage.
  • Grabbed rope and ran.
  • Got advice from divine entity to make sunlight.
  • Hugmug pissed off a Chimera in the woods.
  • The witch still owes us the potions.
Thirteen - In which Snauga is entirely too close to the action for her taste.
On taunting Demons...

Someone finally found a use for an aquatic combat shape, as a druid? Well, that’s something you don’t see every day. Seems the druid cut large holes in their boat as a porpoise, and lit it on fire to boot – shame they didn’t all die, but the loot was really quite nice.

And look at this anchor! Good metal. I can’t believe they drug it all the way back here.

I’m glad they stopped by really I am, but I’d rather not be this close to ground zero for their demon plot – so what if the witch thinks attacking the demons disguised as humans and elves is a great idea, I don’t.

Drubbing some human peasants and convincing them that the demons did it? Sure. Easy, even. Idiots will believe a demon caused their cow to go lame. But we clearly also have to thump the tax collectors themselves, right on my doorstep.

Sigh At least they won. Hopefully the demons were fooled. Now, help me carry this…

- Pyre sank the boat with great awesome, and we scored some loot. Sadly, the adventurers clearly survived, and made it back to town.
- We cached out with the dwarf, and found out that the magic hammer is pretty good at crafting.
- We learned that the humans may have a full on army elsewhere (Also, we were wrong, that was Waincrest, per the witch).
- The witch helped us disguise as humans to attack the tax collector demons, who we killed one of, drove off the rest, then fled.
- The plan is to repeat this with the humans, and then go underground (into the Wizard-hole) with the witch while the humans and demons fight.
- We really, really need to make Bus something to make his Will suck less. He got charmed out of the battle in one round.

Elev-welve - Ettins and Dead 'umans!
How to serve man - usually with potatoes!

They what? Ok, the Ettins, I can understand – killing random monsters in the woods is just good policy, but how many times were they going to try to sneak down that lava tube and catch the humans by surprise?

At least (after that failed, repeatedly and spectacularly), they tried luring them out, too. When that didn’t work, Pyre got the bright idea to sneak in through the arrow slits as a tiny owl – she slit their alarm rope, then popped the door, and ran like hell!

Bus, Baughb, and the other head-smashers pounced, and beat the daylights out of the person who happened to be on guard – by a stroke of luck, the one carrying the bauble for the witch. A daring escape later, and the party was out in the woods, a lot of their stuff back.

Frankly, I can’t believe it worked.

The demons came by for tax…disturbing. They claim the grimlocks have less than two weeks to pay or vacate. Perhaps we should try killing them?

What with one thing and another, the humans did manage to get to the boat, though. Pyre slowed them down with a cleverly placed wood shape – did you know she can turn into a porpoise? On purpose, even!


  • Eleventh chronicle went mostly missing. Lots of unsatisfying psuedo-raids on the humans in their cave with no good plan,
  • Killed some ettins in the woods.
  • Pyre snuck into the human camp and popped the door.
  • We killed the Barbarian and got the Witch’s bauble back.
  • Demons are trying to tax the grimlocks – grimlocks plan to flee.
  • Pyre shaped a hole into the boat, but it wasn’t enough to sink them.
  • We probably need to figure out how to sink the boat.
Ten - Imp, Begone!
Squishy, squishy; you into goo!

Of course the imp works for Kraksis! This should be obvious! I mean, the Wizard- (no, get the blue runes. The red ones tend to explode…) -the Wizard made an infernal pact with Kraksis and an imp just happens to be there after? Yeah, should have seen that one coming.

They broke into Furion’s lab and made off with a bunch of his stuff, through a Druid-made hole in the wall. The lab revealed Furion’s spell book, and his plans (as well as some valuable notes) – he cut an infernal deal with Kraksis, and is trying to get out of it by hiding his soul….in a giant ruby. The same giant ruby we’ve been looking for.

They left the dungeon – casually mauling a pair of Ettins and looting them. The witch was hospitable, as usual, but seemed instantly incensed when we mentioned the imp – pointing out what should have been obvious – the imp works for the baddie -….so we killed him, messily, and nearly instantly.

Now we have a plan – use the gem to show Kraksis’ boss that Kraksis can’t be trusted to deliver what he’s owed. Even better, the witch knows where there’s a tomb that sounds like the one Furion went after.

However, she requires we fetch back her signal eye first – we’re crouching down near where the harpy was, waiting for her to help us challenge them.

Nine - Drug deals, and Imps gone bad?
How to cut a deal, goblin-style.

So much metal, so many runes. Grimlock 5, hold that. No, no, up a little. Right…there. Stay. Hm. This one seems to like fire. Interesting.

So, finally past the golem, it seems. Unseen servant revealed the mage’s fondness for musical golems – as long as you keep the golem playing, all is good.

On, to find a couple of interesting storerooms, and an illusion or two, then the Imp behind it all. He used to be Furion’s right hand, it seems – though Furion never let him in the lab (and we might do well to keep him out of it, as well). Got some interesting stories out of him – Furion disappeared after going seeking some circle of power business – and a long night in the lab. Perhaps Furion let Kraksis in, struck a deal with him, or is Kraksis, himself? (Furion seems too much the stoner for that last.)

He shuts up whenever we get to a sensitive subject, though.

And an infernal pact; lovely. If Baughb has any say in it, it wont be the last one.


  • Cut a deal with the (druggie) imp – he gets to see what’s in the lab, and helps us not die.
  • Imp desperately wants to know what Furion got up to with ‘the circle’ – possibly the circle where we found Hugmug?
  • The imp had some very interesting things to say.
    • Krack-ass is something he won’t talk about. Neither is the contract he had with Furi-pants.
    • Furion’s disappearance definitely related to Kraksis.
    • Furion came in mumbling about how he must finish – work stuff. Got high, and got gone.
    • See other notes on character sheet.
  • We can cut infernal deals with the Imp….
  • Already checked the witch list with the Imp – no luck.

I'm sorry, but we no longer support this web browser. Please upgrade your browser or install Chrome or Firefox to enjoy the full functionality of this site.